The fragility of life (part II)

Publisher’s note: The following is the second part of a series of messages from the OSF Home Care Messages of Hope booklet, “the fragility of life”.

A man I visit regularly lost his wife against lung cancer about two years ago. After the death of his wife, he started to feel horrible stomach pain. He went to all specialists under the sun, had a multitude of tests and tried all possible drugs.

One day, his doctor, who was about to launch your hands, asked, “Did you talk about losing your wife?” The man stopped and said no. He had slipped these feelings and pains so far that he had to go out in one way or another. When you try to ignore the powerful feelings associated with sorrow, they will burst at some point. If you cannot express your sorrow and not work through this pain, physical and psychological responses can manifest themselves in very disturbing forms.

The last act of love that we must give

Bob Deits, a pastoral advisor, describes sorrow as follows:

“Mourning is the last act of love that we must give those who are dead!”

It is a powerful declaration. It is your chance to express your love, your pain and your grief in honor of the one you have lost. I encourage you to keep their memory alive; It’s your gift for them. Mourning is correctly told their story, continuing their inheritance, expressing your feelings, crying when you need to cry, remember these memories and smile.

There are so many ways to commemorate the loss of your beloved. For example, while I am preparing to walk in the aisle later this month, I am comforted by the fact that my grandmother will take my heart. I will wear his necklace.

Remember to wear a piece of jewelry from your loved one, prepare their favorite meal, visit them at the cemetery, plant a tree in their honor or reserve your memories of their lives. Do everything you need to do to keep their memory alive. It’s your time!

Finally, don’t be discouraged. I hear so many people who come to my loss and mourning group say: “Just when I think I do better and I think I overcome this” bump “, something significant will remind me of it and I collapse.” The sorrow is sporadic; It is not only a climb as so many other obstacles that we face in our lives.

When it comes to crying the loss of someone who is dear to us, there are good and bad days, ups and downs, ups and downs. Rest assured that these are not setbacks; Rather, it is the mourning process. Over time, these deep and dark valleys will become more shallow. These peaks will widen until one day you will see that you are again in the field.

Last update: November 6, 2018