Hilaria Baldwin angered her husband, Alec, with this ultimatum about Ireland

For Hilaria Baldwin, children always come first.

Alec Baldwin’s wife, 41, has opened up about her relationship with stepdaughter Ireland Baldwin and how she allowed Ireland to influence her and Alec’s early relationship.

“I told Alec before I met her, I said, ‘If she doesn’t like me, I’m not going to stay because I can’t hurt a family,'” Hilaria shared of her stepdaughter on the Not skinny but not fat podcast on October 7. “And he gets angry. He gets all angry at me then. He gets angry at me when I say it now.”

Hilaria, who has since married Alec, 67, and welcomed seven children with the actor, said she believes “the family unit is the most important thing”.

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“Always be respectful to his mother,” Hilaria said of Ireland’s mother and Alec’s ex, Kim Basinger. “Always understand that it’s Alec, Ireland and Kim. And I can come in and be a guest. And if I’m welcomed, wonderful, I’m there. But I have to be strong enough on my own and not come in and, you know, mark my territory and all that kind of stuff.”

Fortunately, Hilaria and Ireland have cultivated a strong relationship over the years.

“Ireland has really seen me, and Ireland has seen how much I care about her father and her family and her,” Hilaria explained. “And we’ve been blessed to have a wonderful relationship. And it’s not just about being blessed and lucky. It’s also, you know, being a stepmother, you know, and coming into her life when she’s 15, 16. And I’ve always been very clear that I’m there to support her when she needs me.”

She added that her daughter-in-law was “extraordinarily welcoming” to her “from the start”.

“I was very prepared for this to be the case, you know, we had a great few months together and I’m going to go for it,” she said of the possibility of ending her relationship with Alec.

In September, Ireland, 29, took to Instagram to defend and praise her mother-in-law, sharing a photo of them together.

“I wanted to take a second to talk about my mother-in-law @hilariabaldwin. I think if people knew her like I did they would be pretty surprised,” Ireland wrote. “Hilaria had a much more complex and chaotic upbringing than she lets on and I think that’s why maybe we bonded in some way? She didn’t always feel safe and seen. Sometimes she’s too loyal to a fault. She’s eccentric and completely crazy (in a fun way) but she saved my dad’s life. She turned his health around and showed him the forgiveness and kindness he needed. She also recognizes and nurtures the parts of my father that are most compassionate and wonderful.

Ireland also credited Hilaria with her own “close relationship” with Alec.

“She’s the reason I have the siblings/big family I’ve always wanted,” Ireland added. “She always respected me, accepted my flaws, embraced me, and always showed me kindness. I met her when I was a teenager and needed her as an example. I still admire her a lot now. I’m so proud of her for doing Dancing with the Stars and I can’t wait to cheer her up. She deserves that! And it’s not my place to share the ins and outs, but this woman is a gem and deserves it all love.”

At the time, Hilaria responded to the post in the comments section, writing: “I’m crying. I love you with all my heart, @irelandirelandireland ❤️. These words mean so much. You mean so much to me 💙”