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I once had a manager at Meta who continued to move. We would have our individual meetings to align ourselves with priorities and if I have to focus on new features or correct the bugs reported by users.
But after a few days, our plans would suddenly change. Some bugs would become the highest priority, especially if the order came from directors or VPs. I noticed a model where my manager would change my mind after talking with a voluntary project manager or an engineering leader in the chain.
I felt confused and not taken care of.
When this happens, how do you tell your manager to shape? Is it even your responsibility to give comments to your manager?
The 1: 1 is a critical forum to share this type of feedback. A 1: 1 is a meeting targeted between two people within the company, which generally lasts 30 or 45 minutes. When they are well done, these meetings are a precious tool to establish confidence and promote career growth. According to my experience, managers will have a weekly or bihebdomedary 1: 1 with each of their reports. If you have not regularly planned 1: 1 with your manager, you miss. Ask for one!
The effectiveness of a 1: 1 depends on your preparation before the meeting. Here are some basic rules that I established with my reports and my own manager to make them as precious as possible:
- Note the agenda in advance. This shows that you have thought about the meeting and, therefore, it should not be canceled. Keep a document running from everything you have written. It can be useful for you and your manager to refer to previous discussions and elements of action.
- Avoid state updates. Approach each 1: 1 as a precious opportunity to learn something or get a new perspective. Do not hesitate to note the status updates in advance, but you should minimize the time spent in 1: 1 by simply examining the statutes. The conversation should be more focused on emotions and concerns rather than obvious facts.
- Be vulnerable. A decisive test for the conversation is: “Could it have been shared during the wider team meeting?” If the answer is yes, do not waste precious time 1: 1 on this subject. 1: 1 should focus on sticky human problems that inevitably present themselves in the workplace: lose motivation, feel overwhelmed or provide difficult comments, for example.
At Meta, I used 1: 1 with my manager to share my concerns about the constantly changing priorities between new features and bugs reported by users. The problem was not resolved overnight, but at least it was aware of the problem. I felt heard and we continued to monitor the situation as it improved.
What if your manager is not receptive to your comments or your concerns? In almost all cases, it is not worth trying to “repair” your manager or your environment. There is a clear power dynamic between you and your boss, and the energy spent for your manager is better spent to find a new team or a new business.
1: 1 is a critical pillar for our career growth as an engineers. Try these tactics in your next 1: 1 and tell me how it goes.
—Rahul
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